Starting in the Middle

I've heard the expression "trying to find myself" so many times since I've come back to school. I hear it when I ask someone their area of study or when I ask someone why they're not coming back to school and I hear it from young adults just out of high school for no particular reason at all. What a load of crap! I find myself every morning in the mirror when I see a few wrinkles starting to appear or my first grey hair. I'm a 27 year old almost junior in college still deciding what im going to do with the rest of my life. So many young people and oftentimes adults use phrases like "trying to find myself" as something they can hide behind. Why not just come out and say, "I dont know what to study", "I'm still not ready for school" and "I really dont know myself yet"?? Why are these so shameful? It was the journey back to school when I truely discovered that I didnt need to find myself; I needed to be realistic, grow up and just start my own life. Thank goodness I came to that conclusion. School has been hard, particularly BYU-Idaho because it houses such a young population. (Try going to class with people who were born a decade after you and being at the same learning level, THAT is a humbling experience.) With all it's faults, BYU-Idaho has provided me with the springboard for which I can progress with my plan, growing up! So I start my chronicles in the middle of my life.